IMPROVE YOUR MARRIAGE - Don't Overlook The Obvious

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ADVICE, TIPS, PLUS...

                         

Consistency

The problem with 'consistency'
Is that we often choose to break with it,
When it suits our own purpose.
And, yet, we condemn our spouse
When they do the same.

Note: As always, the basic premise does not apply to all couples/ spouses

Admit it (along with me)! We occasionally 'talk a good talk' but don't always 'walk the walk'.
And, one such area of our married lives involves the matter of 'consistency'. Whether it relates to how we raise our children. Or, schedules during the work week and weekends. When we will be sexually intimate. Or, when we go to our chosen house of worship. Or...

Consistency can be a great thing! It allows for a sense of stability. One can feel 'grounded' when one has a routine in place.

Yet, consistency does call for the occasional 'change' if one is to maintain it, overall.
We will from time to time, decide to initiate those expected 'exceptions to the rule'. Typically, when it suits us. Such as when we are exhausted and have 'a headache'. Or when we want to stay home and watch the big game, rather than accompany the rest of the family to our in-laws' home.
There is no big deal about these routine changers.

That is, unless you don't allow your spouse to do the same. - And, therein lies the problem.
Human nature being what it is, we can find it easy to accept our rational for avoiding the routines of our daily life. Yet, we have a difficult time when it comes to affording our wife or husband the same privilege.

So, I ask you to put on the brakes, when you feel the urge coming on, to criticize your spouse's decisions. Yes, it might be disappointing to you. Or, even create a spark of resentment or anger. But, remember they probably feel the same way toward you, at the times when the rules of the game change. And, if they don't appear to care, don't necessarily believe it. Perhaps it is true, but more than likely, they are simply going with the flow, rather than start an argument or ruin what could be a good mood, for all concerned. And, if they truly do not care, then there is even more reason to graciously accept their whims.

Trite as it sounds, marriage is not all about you. That was the way things were in your teen years. By now, you should be well focused on yourself, your spouse, and then, both of you as a couple.

Well, I'm off to change my routine for the sake of my wife. ('Cause I love her. And, she does the same for me!)

'Nuff said!

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IMPROVE YOUR MARRIAGE DON'T OVERLOOK
THE OBVIOUS

   
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I loved her for that she was beautiful...
by Philip James Bailey

I loved her for that she was beautiful;
And that to me she seem'd to be all Nature,
And all varieties of things in one:
Would set at night in clouds of tears, and rise
All light and laughter in the morning; fear
No petty customs nor appearances;
But think what others only dream'd about;
And say what others did but think; and do
What others dared not do: so pure withal
In soul; in heart and act such conscious yet
Such perfect innocence, she made round her
A halo of delight. 'Twas these which won me; --
And that she never school'd within her breast
One thought or feeling, but gave holiday

To all; and that she made all even mine
In the communion of love: and we
Grew like each other, for we loved each other;
She, mild and generous as the air in spring;
And I, like earth all budding out with love.

To My Dear and Loving Husband
by Anne Bradstreet

If ever two were one, then surely we.
If ever man were lov'd by wife, then thee;
If ever wife was happy in a man,
Compare with me ye women if you can.
I prize thy love more then whole Mines of gold,
Or all the riches that the East doth hold.
My love is such that Rivers cannot quench,
Nor ought but love from thee, give recompence.
Thy love is such I can no way repay,
The heavens reward thee manifold I pray.
Then while we live, in love let's so persever,
That when we live no more, we may live ever.